For the Budget-Conscious Bride - Help please!

I know this is going to sound a little crazy, since I'm not even engaged yet, but my boyfriend and I are planning on getting married in about 16 months from now. When we're married I'll be 19 and he'll be 20. Money probably wont be much of an issue, as I'm the only girl and daddy has always said I can have a dream wedding, I do however want to be extremely budget conscious, as both of us will still be paying for school after the wedding. So my first question is what's the best way to do that? Any tips on keeping the cost down? Secondly, I'm looking for advice about getting married at the age I'm at. I know in todays society it's sort of a young age, and most people I've mentioned it to, hold it against me, because they think I should be focusing on school and then a career first, before I even consider marriage. That just wont work for me, so I'm looking for encouragement and strong advice about marriage at a young age. Thanks so Much!!! Nina Wedding Date: June 23rd, 2009

I want to address the second part of your question first. I am sure that the people that are telling you are older than you and probably love you very much. The reason that they are telling you this is because they have more experience in life than you do and they don't want to see you make a mistake that will effect the rest of your life. If you love him as much as you say you do, and vice versa, than you would live your life first and find yourself. If that love is true, it won't go anywhere 4 or 8 or 10 years from now. You will be more mature to handle the responsibilities of marriage. It is not a Cinderella story. There are days when you actually can come to hate the person that you love and there are those that you thank God for having him there. I think you are way to young for such a commitment. Today it is hard on young people, emotionally, physically and finicially. You need to establish yourself in society and know who you are to take on such a large endenvour. I truly hope that you listen to those people around you and wait. With that said, here are ways to save on your wedding.

cont post: Ways to save: 1. get married on off seasons: Hot and more expensive times to get married are April thru June, August thru October. 2. Get married on a Sunday or Weekday. Rate are normally cheaper. 3. Don't get married on holidays. 4. DIY as much as possible 5. Look into parks, public facilities, community centers or halls to hold your wedding and reception. 6. Buy your cake from a whole saler or grocery store. They are normally cheaper. In some areas Walmart sells cakes as well. 7. Hand deliver as many wedding invitations in person as you can. This will save on postage. 8. Buy flowers that are locally grown and those that are in season. 9. Look for pre-owned wedding gowns on Ebay or other sources, wait to after wedding season is over and buy your wedding dress than. Most boutiques are trying to get rid of their old stock to make way for the new.

10. Check your states requirements for who can officiate. Many states wil allow a friend or family member to do it. They would only need to complete a course that is offer online. I am not sure if there is a cost for this. 11. If you have friends or family members that recently been married, see if they have any supplies from their wedding left. You may be able to things from them free of charge. 12. Shop and book as early as possible for vendors. If they know a year in advance that they will have a booking, they may give you a discount. 13. Always ask for a discount. You never know until you try. 14. If you know of someone that is good with floral arrangements, see if they would be will to do it for you. Buy your flowers in bulk. 15. Don't think that a buffett is always cheaper. Sometimes a caterer will charge more, because they would need to prepare more food to keep the stations stock. So, always asks. 16. Have your family and friends cook instead of hiring someone. 17. Consider hiring a professional wedding coordinator. They often get you additional discounts and find problems in contracts that you would not be aware of.

I agree with you. take your time and enjoy your youth, you need to become responsible and live life first if you two are still in love several years will not matter. marriage is hard. as is life in general [quote=sillybride;215966]I want to address the second part of your question first. I am sure that the people that are telling you are older than you and probably love you very much. The reason that they are telling you this is because they have more experience in life than you do and they don't want to see you make a mistake that will effect the rest of your life. If you love him as much as you say you do, and vice versa, than you would live your life first and find yourself. If that love is true, it won't go anywhere 4 or 8 or 10 years from now. You will be more mature to handle the responsibilities of marriage. It is not a Cinderella story. There are days when you actually can come to hate the person that you love and there are those that you thank God for having him there. I think you are way to young for such a commitment. Today it is hard on young people, emotionally, physically and finicially. You need to establish yourself in society and know who you are to take on such a large endenvour. I truly hope that you listen to those people around you and wait. With that said, here are ways to save on your wedding.[/quote]

I'd have to agree with the other ladies about waiting. When I think about the girl I was at 19, I cannot imagine her being married.

You know, I am 21 and I was with my fiance when I was 19 and i KNEW then that I wanted to be with him the rest of my life. If you 100 percent with no questions asked know that you love this man and the same with him, then why wait!!?? Your young, yes, but you are an adult.. you have the ability to make your own choices. As for school, its much easier when you have someone going thru it with you and if you two got married then he would be by your side every day and night to help you out. The only thing I would tell you to wait on is children. I have 2 with my fiance and I am in college and its hard work! But if you love this man and he loves you.. then why wait any longer? AGE IS JUST A NUMBER SWEETIE. : - ]

Thank you !

Diddo to brweneyedmom2bdfd! I too am in college. I am getting married in three weeks! I am 20 and he is 21. We have been together for 4 years now. It can be tough in todays society like you said because it is so rare to get married young, however, if you feel thats what you should be doing then go for it. The ppl who replied on here telling you shouldnt, are obviously ppl who care about finishing school, establishing a career , making money, etc. (and there is nothing wrong with that), however, some people, like you and i function so much better in society if we have a partner with us- and there is NOTHING wrong with that either. Some people feel that they can figure out who they are on their own- others feel that figuring that out with the love your life is best. It varies from person to person. And that is totally up to you to decide. Also, what they are saying about "finding yourself" isnt taking into consideration that maybe you already have? Im not sure. I see both arguments, on the other hand, what is best for most in society isnt always best for ALL in society. I support you! :) and just for the record, i DO NOT have anything against the people for saying to wait- they do have some good input- however, we WOMEN that want to marry "young" should stick together...and never forget...it wasnt too long ago when people got married when they were our age...as a matter of fact, by the time my mother was 24 she had 4 babies and was married. Marriage at our age could actually be more benefical for us- even tho it may not be for the rest. I hope you have a beautiful wedding and marriage! Keep up the strength! I understand where you're coming from and once you have your husband no one can say anything else! oh yeah, and for the record...an education and a career is obtainable while married! My finace still has 2 years left at PennState and I still have a year left, Not only that, but he is in the honors college and has a 4.0 GPA. in other words, it can be done! :) Dated since: 04.17.14 Engaged since: 11.25.06 to be Wed: May 17, 2008 :) only 24 more days!!

I may be biased, but I feel cutting back on the photographer is a bad idea. It's the only real, tangible, memories you have from the day. As long as the food is not 'bad' and there is enough of it... no one will remember it. I think a Pot-luck would be awesome, but you'd have to find a way to get that by the 'tradition police'. Skip the videographer... a cool addition to a wedding, but not a 'must have'. At your age, you probably have more time than money... use that to your advantage: make your own things, invites, thank you's, favors, etc.

I agree and disagree on waiting due to your age. I am 24 and I've been with my fiance for 7 years. We thought about getting married when I was 18 and he was 20, but we waited. We just got engaged this April and will be getting married May 2009. I will tell you this; neither of our families wanted us to marry at such an young age and we fought them but in the end decided (due to circumstance) to wait. I am so happy that we did. We've been through everything in those last 5 years and it made us both stronger. If we would have gotten married then something tells me it would not have lasted. We are both much more mature, finanically sound, and understanding than we ever could have been at that age. If you are sure you want to do this now then more power to you. I could'nt have known then that my fiance and I would still be together now, but we are, which shows that young love can last. I will tell you this, I am glad we waited. Whatever you decide to do, good luck.